The New Democrat Online

Sunday, February 23, 2014

The Onion: Open Relationship Gives Couple Freedom to Emotionally Drain Other People


Source: The Onion-
Source: This piece was originally posted at The New Democrat

Sure, why take your frustrations out on your spouse when you can take them out on your mistress. Instead, you could just say, "Honey, look, I don't want to argue this with you," and go meet your mistress and have it out with her instead and then if there's anything you didn't cover with her, your wife will be there at home for you to finish off your critical arguments about whose turn it was to wash the dishes or pick up the kids from school or pay the monthly porno bill. Marriage is just to valuable of an institution to waste badgering your own spouse. Especially when you have so many women who are free (and need money) and you just meet them instead and take out your frustrations on them. And leave the important discussions about who should pick up Johnny and Sally from their soccer practice. Who should cook dinner, who should answer the phone and really go at each other on such life and death important issues like that. And leave the real arguments about who is spending too much money on the credit card with your mistress. And go off on her about spending so much money on fur coats, jewelry, weekend getaways, etc. 
The Onion: Open Relationship Gives Couple Freedom To Emotionally Drain Other People